10 Reasons why I still miss the Houston Oilers
SHIRTS vs SKINS: In their first game ever, against the Dallas Texans, some 1960 version of a “crackhead” broke into their crappy dressing rooms at the converted High School stadium they called home, Jepperson Field. The burglar stole most of the team’s jerseys. They were forced to borrow jerseys from the Dallas team, and wore them inside-out. They lost 27-10.
PAYDAY BLUES: A rookie player, Charles Lockhart, who had been cut by the team, pulled a pistol on GM Don Klosterman and demanded his pay for the rest of the month. A bystander wrestled the gun from him, but Klosterman paid the player..
TRADED: The team traded a quarterback for…. himself, AND a first round draft pick. Yep, they sent Jacky Lee to Denver for a 1st round pick, and himself after 2 years of “seasoning” in Denver. This has gotta be the strangest trade ever made in pro football.
JUST PLAIN WEIRD: Oilers Head Coach Jerry Glanville used to leave tickets for dead celebrities such as Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, and Rocky Marciano.
TURNOVERS: The Oilers’ first Coach, Lou Rymkus, won the championship. Therefore he was fired. This set the tone for Bud Adams ownership of the team. Coaches would change often. Head Coach Pop Ivy came to work one day, and his secretary handed him his desk drawer. Bud Adams became the “Henry the Eighth of team owners” until he met Bum Phillips. Phillips was an itinerant high school coach who fell into the job and tenaciously held on for years.
THE FICKLE FINGER: In one of Don Meredith’s early TV broadcasts, the Oakland Raiders were beating Houston 34-0 in the 3rd quarter. The fans left in droves. As the TV camera panned the empty stands, they focused on a solitary figure, who saluted a national TV audience with his middle finger. After a pause, Meredith explained: “He’s telling us his team is still #1″.
LOST HALL-OF-FAMERS: The Oilers traded their rights to draft Joe Namath for Jerry Rhome. Who? They could have had tight end Mike Ditka, but opted for Willard Dewveall instead. They cut future Oakland cornerback Willie Brown. Steve Largent (all-time leading NFL receiver) was waived. They traded Charlie Joiner to the Bengals for no one important. The swapped Ken Houston to the Skins for no one who made a difference. They even got rid of George Blanda, because he was too old. He played great for 9 more years. All of those players are now in the Pro Football Hall Of Fame.
FIGHTS: Owner Bud Adams got into a brawling fistfight with a Houston Post reporter who made fun of his outlandish cowboy outfit at a league meeting. (“Don’t you feel self-conscious showing up for a league business meeting dressed up like a homosexual rodeo clown?” was the likely ignition point.) Management followed up when GM Ladd Herzeg clocked Houston Chronic Reporter Fran Blinebury. Even the players got in on the fisticuffs, with QB Dan Pastorini roughing up a Post reporter on local TV. Herzeg also was arrested for “mooning” a wedding and punching the best man; and lost an unrelated paternity suit.
MOST SACKED QB: Oilers QB Dan Pastorini set records which still stand in each of his first three years. No quarterback was ever sacked more often. The entire offensive line was replaced each of those years. Dan’s ribs were broken a minimum of six times. A special “flak jacket” was constructed for him. He is lucky to be alive today.
THE BEST THING: The best news about the Oilers departure to Tennessee was that Houston sports fans no longer had to have their football hopes funneled through the miserly checkbook of the notoriously greedy Bud Adams. The desire in Houston was for a professional football team, something the Oilers provided only sporadically. The Texans are doing a much better job.
HOWEVER, I STILL MISS THE OILERS: Because there has never been a team with more pure entertainment value and drama going on, even during the off-season.
